Wednesday, July 28, 2004

 

Have you had your daily absurdity today?

The Sulzberger Fish Wrapper and Pompous American published this article on the possibility of the MTA selling naming rights for various transportation facilities, in the same manner as sports arenas. I suppose we can look forward to the Duracell Brooklyn Battery Tunnel and the Ronzoni Verrazano Bridge at the least. I would imagine that intimate personal care products and vermin removers won't necessarily be considered for sponsorship unless the price is right, and I'll leave it to the reader as an exercise to find the most offensive sponsor for a bridge or tunnel. Nota bene - the bridges and tunnels to Jersey are not controlled by the MTA, but rather the Port Authority, of World Trade Center and airport infamy.

And turning to their (ahem) editorial page, we find Mr. Krugman opining on the need for audits of elections. The first question I would ask Mr. Krugman is who is going to conduct these audits? A Big 4 accounting firm? At their best, they sign opinions or attestations based on what the client provides them, and at their worst, well, that whirring sound you hear is old Artie A. spinning in his final resting place. I have some interesting observations on how a Big 4  firm performs IT audits, but they're not germane to this discussion (but I promise a future post will deliver some nice dish on them).  Then, there are the Democrat lower digestive orifices that are calling for the U freaking N to observe our elections. Let me guess, Syria, Iran, Nigeria and Ivory Coast are going to lecture us on democracy? Shame on these Democrats. I would expect something like this from an idiot like Edolphus Towns, who misrepresents the district gerrymandered from Shirley Chisholm and Elizabeth Holtzman's old districts (note to Ed, you have an awful lot of folks in your district who scrimped and saved to get their butts to the US and buy houses and participate in the American dream, they'll tell you just how democratic those third world toilets are). And of course Jerrold Nadler, who's only interest in pork is if it's on a plate served to him (and ranting about a rail tunnel for Bay Ridge that will never get built).   I'm sure that they and the other frothy-mouthed Democrats who are agitating for this assistance will be well represented on this week's convention coverage, describing how wonderfully progressive Lurch and The Ambulance Chaser will be.

For some reason I'm reminded of a scene that appears in various kaiju movies (that's the Japanese genre that spawned not only the large city-wrecking creature features, but some of their horridly childish science fiction) where the cops are holding a police line, and the intrepid reporters who always seem to be the protagonists of said features try to cross the barrier, being stopped with "You can't go in there! The monster is in there!". The reporters say "But we're with the UN!", getting an unctuous "Ah, so, UN. OK!". The likelihood of this scene translating to current Iraq is left as an exercise to the reader.

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