Monday, July 12, 2004


The Proprietor's Cultural Index

And just for the hell of it, let's do my cultural (or nekulturny as the case may be) index. Score a point for every choice in Column A. Divide by the total number of questions answered (in other words, ignore the Don't Knows and ties). Be frightened or glad when you realize how close or far you are from my cultural tastes.

Given the choice, would you prefer:
1. Cathy or Patty?
2. Bailey or Jennifer?
3. Heckle and Jeckle or Screwy Squirrel?
4. Tex Avery or Ward Kimball?
5. Mick Taylor or Ron Wood?
6. Cisco or Nortel?
7. Reuters or Bloomberg?
8. Solaris or AIX?
9. Specialist or Clearing Broker?
10. Exile On Main Street or Sticky Fingers?
11. Tommy or Quadrophenia?
12. Get Yer Ya-Yas Out or Live At Leeds?
13. Stratocaster or Telecaster?
14. SG or Les Paul?
15. Vox or Fender?
16. Steak avec sauce bearnaise or au poivre?
17. Chimay or Orval?
18. Speyside or Islay?
19. SuSE or Red Hat?
20. Revolver or Sgt. Pepper?
21. Paulie or Christuffuh?
22. German or French?
23. Ludwig or Pearl?
24. D'Angelico or D'Aquisto?
25. Brooklyn diners or Jersey diners?
26. The Addams Family or The Munsters?
27. Pat Priest or Beverly Owen?
28. Major Hochstetter or General Burkhalter?
29. Bialys or Bagels?
30. GG-1 or AEM-7?
31. '63 E-Type Roadster or '63 Corvette?
32. '57 Corvette or '57 T-Bird?
33. Tubes or Solid State?
34. Stan Getz or Gerry Mulligan?
35. Wes Montgomery on Riverside or Wes Montgomery on Verve?
36. Charlie Byrd or Barney Kessel?
37. Kaiju or Kurosawa?
38. Bowery Bugs or Rabbit Seasoning?
39. Crusader Rabbit or George Of The Jungle?
40. Sandy Becker or Uncle Fred Scott?
41. Officer Joe or Captain Jack?
42. Fox's U-Bet or Bosco?
43. Bosco or Cocoa Marsh?
44. Chow Fun or Lo Mein?
45. Arthur Bryant's or Virgil's?
46. Chuck Jones or Friz Freleng?
47. Pet Sounds or Smile?
48. "City On The Edge Of Forever" or "Where No Man Has Gone Before"?
49. Forbidden Planet or 2001?
50. Tenneseean or Country Gentleman?
51. Clausewitz or Sun Tzu?
52. Machiavelli or Metternich?
53. Otis Redding or Wilson Pickett?
54. Outerbridge or Goethals?
55. Turnpike or Parkway?
56. Route 35 or Route 9? (Alright already with the Jersey questions!)
57. Thunderbird 2 or Thunderbird 1?
58. Nathan's or Corn Dogs?
59. Corned Beef or Pastrami?
60. Knishes, round or square?
61. Pauillac or Margaux?
62. Vouvray or Montrachet?
63. Black Course at Bethpage or Winged Foot?
64. Jack or Arnie?
65. Yankees or Mets?
66. Schaefer or Rheingold?
67. '69 Mets won it or the Cubs choked?
68. MFN or MFS?
69. MQ or TIB?
70. Boss 302 or 455 Hemi?
71. EMD or GE?
72. Constellation or DC3?
73. Starship Troopers or The Forever War?
74. Dune or Foundation?
75. Destination Moon or The Conquest Of Space?
76. Kaspar Gutman or Joel Cairo?
77. The Bowery Boys or The Dead End Kids?
78. Joe Besser or Joe DeRita?
79. Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein or the Abbott and Costello TV show?
80. Duck Soup or A Night At The Opera?
81. Blazing Saddles or Young Frankenstein?
82. Sinatra on Capitol or Sinatra on Reprise?
83. Dave Berg or Jack Davis?
84. Sergio Aragones or Don Martin?
85. Sergio Mendes or Herb Alpert?
86. The President's Analyst or Our Man Flint?
87. Operation Crossbow or The Heroes Of Telemark?
88. Mr. Terrific or Captain Nice?
89. Carlo Gambino or Vito Genovese?
90. Carnegie Deli or Stage Deli?
91. Hong Ying or Wo Hop?
92. Salerno's or Gargiulio's?
93. Debbie Watson or Deborah Walley?
94. Barbara Feldon or Melody Patterson?
95. Professor Mattic or Brains?
96. The Yardbirds with Beck or Clapton?
97. Sicilian or regular?
98. Ringo or Charlie?
99. I'm Not Your Stepping Stone or Valleri?
100. Phospho-Soda or NuLytely?

And the bonus question, for absolutely no reason other than prurient interest and pure one-upmanship.....

101. Marcia or Jan?


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